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monsters!

Do you know what it's like to feel scared, even terrified every day of your young life? What it's like to try so hard everyday to be absolutely perfect, to never set a foot wrong, to mind your p’s and q’s, to do all your chores and only to realise that being perfect isn't good enough. Being perfect means nothing! 
 There are monsters in this world!  not make believe movie monsters, but real life monsters that wear friendly faces and bright smiles. These monsters don't care how perfect you are because it's all a game to them. They simply enjoy destroying people.  
They get a real thrill out of hurting you and no matter what you do,  no matter what fantasy you make up in your head;  a fantasy where they see how perfect you are,  and love you,  and protect you and apologise for ever hurting you, a fantasy where you feel warm and safe and happy! It's all a lie because the truth is they have an overwhelming need to hurt you, they derive great pleasure in torturing you and seeing your fear. It’s  power to them, it's a rush akin to a drug. 
If only I'd known back then that no amount of perfect was ever going to change my circumstances… no amount of perfect was ever going to save me. 

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